Surge and Snow are mysteriously transported to the world of DRAGONDARK where they battle Annabelle Hitler Jr. and Arctic! BUY NOW!
SURGE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD
A short-story of Surge's past that occurs just before the events of SURGE #1. Read for FREE now, right here on CD Artist Productions.
HEROES & LORE
So apparently this is supposed to be some super-serious LORE page where the history of GRIMM, INDIANA is explained. Man, who knows?? Look, I'm a 6'4" walking cosmic accident. I was drawn into existence by The Artist and I go from walking out of the ocean stark naked in front of crowds of people, to having the feds up my ass experimenting on me and trying to make me their super-powered cop to fighting zombies and even a robot version of me.
Part of my contract with the government is to write this stupid LORE page. That's why I'm here and hopefully, you're still reading.
My father is the Greek deity, Poisedon. He's the god of storms and seas. He has a drinking problem. I don't know who my mother is. Like I said, I came out of the ocean one day and became a super-cop. That term is probably trademarked. Or some writer for Deadpool or Batman somewhere was going to use it or something. Whatever. Here's your LORE...
1994 - I showed up naked.
1995 - I fought my first mission with a mercenary group in the jungles of Brazil. It was like most 1980s action movies, I met a woman (I have to keep her name confidential or she might sue me) who was code-named Arctic. She controlled temperatures around her and could make cool ice stuff sort of like Iceman from X-Men, but hotter. I wonder why she didn't ever heat things up?
1996 - My publicist told me the government believed I needed a sidekick. They gave me a golden goldfish in a bowl named Goldie Surge. I still have that 27-year-old goldfish.
1997 - The government decided to create a team of heroes to help me against my rogues gallery which consisted of only four or five guys. It didn't last very long.
1998 - I went on vacation and got into a situation with another woman. She was an 80-foot-tall orangutan named King Konnie. The government stole my little future Surge's and impregnated Konnie. I've been told I have 13 sets of twins as a result of mine and Konnie's time together. The government has yet to allow me to see the kids but I hear Konnie is doing well in New York as a model.
1999 - I went on a talk show called Chatty Cathy and got in a fight. The government wasn't happy.
2000 - I went on vacation and became Farmer Surge for a while just outside of a small town called Grimm, Indiana.
2001 - 2010 - Something happened. I don't know what. Strange things outside of the normal crime and gangs in Grimm, Indiana started happening about nine years in. Missy Muffet and Spider got murdered. So did Mama Bear and Big Bad Johnny Wolfe. A whole bunch of people died. God and The Devil even showed up! It turned out Pierce Charming had made some sort of evil pact with someone mysterious and Zeus, my boss, knew about it but kept his mouth shut and Black Cheetah (that's my partner) got wrapped up in all of it and got himself killed.
In 2006 - Like I said. I don't know what happened. Strange things also started happening to me. I had a weird dream that looked like a comic book of Cheetah betraying me. Little did I realize Pierce's pockets ran deep and it would actually happen five years later. In the dream I also had my bone spurs in my arms sawed off by some woman who smelled like Peppermint. When I woke they were gone but I wasn't harmed in any way at all.
2011 - 2023 - Most cop work happens away from the cameras and lights and involves a lot of detective work. Hence the gap in work history.
2023 - Snow Whitney and I left 15 minutes ago for the Chicago Comic-Con to confront The Artist who trademarked my name and image and has been using some strange voodoo to create all of these random events including my bones spurs coming back, that have happened to me.
2024 - Snow and I somehow got transported to a place called Nerin Toth. It's like Dungeons & Dragons shit out Night of the Living Dead or something. Oh, and Snow's old boyfriend, Chris Rook, he died from being impaled by a telephone pole and somehow his soul got trapped in my body, so now I'm Chris Rook. Whatever. Oh, and the same thing happened with Arctic and Snow. Arctic died now Arctic's soul is trapped in Snow and she has powers now like Iceman. We live in some places here in Nerin Toth called the El Tomath Kingdom in a city called Peregren. People keep calling me an ogre, which is really rude.
And there you go. There's the LORE of Grimm, Indiana. Maybe I'll write more sometime.
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